Saturday, October 18, 2008

I Predict a Riot - Week 7 in the NFL

We begin today with the news that is surely on everybody’s mind, I know it’s all the talk around the Sports As Life offices this morning and was on the front page of the Leader Post – the fact that Joe the Plumber is neither a plumber, nor named Joe.

From the New York Times:

As it turns out, Joe the Plumber, as he became nationally known when Senator John McCain made him a theme at Wednesday’s final presidential debate, may work in the plumbing business, but he is not a licensed plumber.

Thomas Joseph, the business manager of Local 50 of the United Association of Plumbers, Steamfitters and Service Mechanics, based in Toledo, said Thursday that Mr. Wurzelbacher had never held a plumber’s license, which is required in Toledo and several surrounding municipalities. He also never completed an apprenticeship and does not belong to the plumber’s union, which has endorsed Mr. Obama. On Thursday, he acknowledged that he does plumbing work even though he does not have a license.

His full name is Samuel J. Wurzelbacher. And he owes back taxes, too, public records show. The premise of his complaint to Mr. Obama about taxes may also be flawed, according to tax analysts. Contrary to what Mr. Wurzelbacher asserted and Mr. McCain echoed, neither his personal taxes nor those of the business where he works are likely to rise if Mr. Obama’s tax plan were to go into effect, they said.

Oh snap – take that, people who try to capitalize on things they haven’t properly vetted.

Wait, that’s not the front page story everyone’s talking about his? Oh right – that other front page story.

You know, even as I’m writing this I’m still not sure what I’m going to say about this. Clearly this is not the worst thing in the history of the human race, because this is:

But it is really bad, right? I’m not crazy in thinking that?

There seems to be a lot of people out there (more than there should be) who think the officer in the video is responsible for the whole melee – and started it somehow. Personally – I don’t know, I wasn’t there and didn’t see how everything got started. But from what I saw, the cop was totally justified in his actions.

Those who know me well will be shocked that I’m taking a cop’s side about anything. But quite honestly, what do we expect the cop to do? He’s on his own in a crowd of drunks trying to eject somebody, when all of a sudden someone else is clawing at his back and belt – which just happens to be where he keeps his sidearm, pepper spray and billy club. From the video it’s pretty obvious the fan clutching at the cop isn’t deliberately going for the gun or anything – but do we really think the cop is going to know that in the heat of the moment? The guy grabbing at the cop is lucky he’s not picking chunks of skull out of his brain – and you know what, if that was the case – I’d still say the cop was totally justified.

Obviously there are legitimate instances of police brutality in Canada and around the world, but this isn’t one of them.

And you know what, this isn’t specifically about Rider Fans either, even though there is much wringing of hands in the Rider Nation. This particular instance happened to involve fans in Rider jerseys and happened to be caught on tape. But I can guarantee this is not the only time something like this has happened in a CFL stadium recently.

There is a serious problem with respect and entitlement these days. But that’s another discussion for another day. And believe you me; I am in no way, shape or form old enough to be talking about “the youth of today” – but come on!

As much as I love to turn the screws on Rider Fans just to get a reaction out of them, as a general rule they are decent good-natured football fans who just love their team. But oh how we long for the days when they would just dump manure on your driveway, am I right?

Oh, and alcohol might have been a factor as well.

But onto the business at hand:

Baltimore @ Miami – If Ray Lewis and Joey Porter didn’t exist, how much more oxygen would there be in Earth’s atmosphere? Conversely, how much less carbon dioxide would there be? Is it possible that loudmouth NFL linebackers are the cause of global warming, and not greenhouse gasses? Commission a multi-million dollar study at once!
Winner: Miami by a Wildcat

Pittsburgh @ Cincinnati - The battle for the mustache capital of the United States. Or maybe not, Philadelphia would probably have to be involved in that game.
Winner: Pittsburgh

New Orleans @ Carolina - Because I'm allowed to be biased, I hope New Orleans wins this game. I have a soft spot for them for some reason - and I really don't want Tampa to win that division.
Winner: New Orleans

San Francisco @ NY Giants - The cross-country flight and early game time are probably going to be trouble for the 49ers. I'm mean, they're not very good anyway - but that probably won't help. At least they can score points this year - they just can't stop anybody from scoring more than they can.
Winner: New York

Minnesota @ Chicago - So last week Minnesota was only able to score 12 points against the brick wall that is the Detroit Lions defence? Forgive me if I'm a little skeptical about what they can do on the road against Chicago. Take the under.
Winner: Chicago

Tennessee @ Kansas City – The Chiefs are falling faster than the women Larry Johnson shoves at nightclubs. Johnson is suspended for this game after getting charged with assault for the 3rd time in 5 years. Never been convicted but has been in a domestic violence diversion program. He also ran for a total of 2 yards on 7 carries against Carolina two weeks ago. Both things are deplorable, not equally – but both still deplorable.
Winner: Tennessee

San Diego @ Buffalo - I think the bloom will be fully off the Buffalo rose after this game. I have no confidence in them and San Diego is going to come into this game guns blazing.
Winner: San Diego

Dallas @ St Louis - Man up Tony Romo, you're team needs you. But much more importantly, my fantasy team needs you. Do you really think Jessica Simpson is going to stay with you if you're going to be standing on the sidelines all the time. She needs a man of action
Winner: Dallas

Detroit @ Houston - I invoke my constitutionally guaranteed right not to have to write anything about a football game I care nothing about and has no impact whatsoever. It is in the constitution - look it up.
Winner: Houston

Indianapolis @ Green Bay - Fun fact, over the last 6 months Tom Brady and Peyton Manning have had 4 knee surguries between them.
Winner: Indianapolis

Cleveland @ Washington - So which one of these teams is actually for real? Cleveland will be trying to prove that last week wasn't a fluke. And Washington will be trying to prove that last week was a fluke.
Winner: Washington

NY Jets @ Oakland - I don't suppose many teams are hoping for their owners to die, but surely Oakland is almost there. But the joke is on them because due to an experimental surgury in 1987, Al Davis cannot die.
Winner: New York

Seattle @ Tampa Bay – This is the Sunday night game?!!?!?!! No wonder John Madden isn’t going to show up to call this game. I don’t want to watch it and I don’t even have to drive across the United States in a bus to get there.
Winner: Tampa Bay

Denver @ New England – First team to force a punt wins! Oh, and Jay Cutler thinks he’s better than John Elway. I’m constantly flip-flopping on which quarterback I like less – Jay Cutler or Phillip Rivers. As much as I dislike Tom Brady, at least he has WON something and therefore could do some bragging if he wanted – like, say, if he wanted to tell anybody who would listen that he’s a better quarterback than Steve Grogan. That would be fine.
Winner: Denver


Rider Prophet said...

I was at the game (though on the other side of the stadium).

Obviously the guy who grabbed the cop's belt is an idiot and deserved what he got (though I question where in the police training manual they recommend tackling a guy down 3 rows of fans so you end up on your back in the middle of a big crowd, but I digress).

I do love how this 30 second video clip is being used to paint all Rider fans in a bad light when in reality the ratio of Stamp fans being ejected compared to Rider fans was about even.

And too be fair many of those Rider fans that were ejected probably just didn't want to watch the rest of that terrible game and were too lazy to walk out under their own power.

Rider Prophet said...

Wow how about them Broncos?

That was a disgraceful game! What made matters worse was the fact that all I needed was for Plater to kick 1 field goal to win my fantasy football match-up. One measly FG. Guess that's what I get for putting my faith in the Denver Broncos.

Napoleon in Rags said...

The Broncos' tackling was absolutely the worst I've ever seen - and I watched the Roughriders circa 2002.

I feel your pain on the fantasy front - altough this week I was on the opposite end, as I won by 1.26 points