Monday, August 10, 2009

32 Teams in 30-some Days: The New York Jets

Since I can't think of anything really interesting to say about the Jets other than: rookie head coach, possible rookie quarterback, probably decent defense - I figure this is a good place for my late-to-the-party Brett Favre rant.

As retribution for another offseason of Brett Favre waving his arms in the air and yelling, "Hey everybody look over here!" I think the NFL should punish him under the player conduct policy. I'm serious - over the past 6 months who has done more to hurt the image of the NFL, Marshawn Lynch or Brett Favre? Sure Lynch might have been high and had a loaded gun in his car, but Favre's "will I, or won't I?" routine caused the Swine Flu (that's what I heard, at least). That's much worse than felony gun possession.

And what should Favre's punishment be, you ask? How about this...

A lifetime ban from the Hall of Fame.

I'm serious. I know that may sound harsh but I can't think of a punishment more appropriate for an attention-whore like Favre. The Hall of Fame induction would be Favre's ultimate moment in the spotlight - all the media types would be singing his praises and lavishing him with all the love that poorly-dressed men in their 40's with questionable hygiene have to give.

Take all that away from Favre and that's a real punishment.

Even after all the faux soul-searching Brett Favre has done in the past two years I think the thing that makes me the maddest is that at the end of everything this year, he decided not to come back. He strung the Vikings along for months and in the end decided to pack up his ego and stubble and go home. And then he makes it seem like he's a victim in his well-orchestrated charade by saying it was the hardest decision he's ever had to make. Brett, I think I speak for everyone when I say, go away and never come back.

But you'll know he'll be back, right? Even though he couldn't man up to go through training camp and a full regular season, he left the door open for a return by saying if a team calls in November he'll listen.

Probability of Brett Favre not playing in the NFL this season: 0%
Probability of me having a coronary during the unending speculation about his eventual return: 100%

Oh... the New York Jets, you say? My guess is that they will finish somewhere around 2nd - 4th in the AFC East.


Rider Prophet said...

As a Vikings fan I can't say I'm overly confident in either hurricane Rosenfal or Tarvaris... but thank god Favre didn't end up in purple!! I'd rather suffer through mediocre QBing than deal with the neverending Favre saga.

Napoleon in Rags said...

Not that I'm a Viking fan, but I can't imagine Favre playing for Minnesota after spending all those years in Green Bay.

It would have been like Rocky Balboa boxing for the Soviet Union at the 1980 Olympics.

However, I am extremely excited that "Hurricane Rosenfels" is catching on. It's taking the nation by storm!

Anonymous said...

Pretty sure that entry into the Hall Of Fame for Favre is as sure a thing as hearing lame busking on the Scarth St. mall. However, his true punishment should be watching There's Something About Marry every night for the next 30 years.